Consent vs. Intent
How can a woman think of consenting or not consenting for a thing which a man didn't even intend to do ?
About a couple of decades ago, a movement started in India, with sole agenda of countering misogyny.
What is misogyny ? It is defined as the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against women or girls.
That movement was a success and was able to bridge some gap between the orthodox (old) and the younger generations.
While that movement is still active and is doing wonders in the country, a new facet of this movement has been observed nowadays and that is misandry.
Heard the word for the first time? Don't worry. The word struggles for its existence even in Oxford English Corpus where it has 29 examples while misogyny appears more than 1,500 times.
What is misandry? It is simply, misogyny of men. It is the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against men or boys. Sounds strange? But it's true.
In recent times, what these 'pro-feminist' movements have done is that instead of supporting the cause for which they originally came to life, they have shifted their focus towards men . As the common adage goes - 'If you can't match your opponent's strength, make him match yours' , they have targeted the rights of men.
So men are always considered perpetrators no matter what is the situation.
Even the fathers of Indian constitution were not that generous towards men. It is an established fact that criminal justice system in India is suffering from the misuse of pro feminist laws like domestic violence law 498 A, laws for prevention of sexual harassment at workplace and male rape laws. Like USA, UK and European Union States; India also needs more gender neutral anti-harassment prevention laws.
A common allegation on men by women is that the former tried to get in a physical relationship with the later without her consent.
Men should understand that following is not a consent for physical relationship :
- a girl in short dress
- a girl alone on street at midnight
- a girl alone in a room with you
- girl alone in a car at midnight
- girl in a club
- a girl going on dinner or drinks with you
But what's more common mistake is that women pretend to know the intent of a male even without any prior knowledge of his character.
So, the question quite certain here is that how can one think of consenting or not consenting for a thing which other didn't even intend to do ?
So, if we are urging men to understand what is consent and what is not, women should also recognize that following is not an intent for assault :
- a boy approaching a girl wearing a short dress
- a boy coming and sitting next to a girl in a bus or train
- a boy in an overfilled bus or train who is helpless and can't stop himself from pushing a female passenger standing in front.
- a boy approaching a girl walking alone on street at midnight.
The current mindset of Indian society is that people think women need more attention.What they need to understand and realise is - being a woman is not a disability and hence they do not demand special care.
Let me finish by quoting an incident -
A man used to go to his office daily by bus. Once a woman hopped on to already filled bus, so this man, vacated his seat for her. Next day, the same woman boarded the bus and the same man again left his seat. This went on for a few days and now the woman used to get on the bus and stand next to that same man who would offer his seat. But one day, this man decided not to leave his seat for that woman, leaving her extremely annoyed and frustrated.
This incidence had put me in a dilemma, as to whether the man was right or wrong. Can you help me out with this ?
What do you think? Do you think man was insensitive in not offering his seat ? or you think woman was wrong in getting annoyed with male co-passenger?
Speak up and don't forget to LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS in the comment section below !!
- AMAN BANSAL
FOLLOW ON TWITTER - @bansalaman23
LIKE MY PAGE ON FACEBOOK - Shayari ke Khatir
About a couple of decades ago, a movement started in India, with sole agenda of countering misogyny.
What is misogyny ? It is defined as the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against women or girls.
That movement was a success and was able to bridge some gap between the orthodox (old) and the younger generations.
While that movement is still active and is doing wonders in the country, a new facet of this movement has been observed nowadays and that is misandry.
Heard the word for the first time? Don't worry. The word struggles for its existence even in Oxford English Corpus where it has 29 examples while misogyny appears more than 1,500 times.
What is misandry? It is simply, misogyny of men. It is the hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against men or boys. Sounds strange? But it's true.
In recent times, what these 'pro-feminist' movements have done is that instead of supporting the cause for which they originally came to life, they have shifted their focus towards men . As the common adage goes - 'If you can't match your opponent's strength, make him match yours' , they have targeted the rights of men.
So men are always considered perpetrators no matter what is the situation.
Even the fathers of Indian constitution were not that generous towards men. It is an established fact that criminal justice system in India is suffering from the misuse of pro feminist laws like domestic violence law 498 A, laws for prevention of sexual harassment at workplace and male rape laws. Like USA, UK and European Union States; India also needs more gender neutral anti-harassment prevention laws.
A common allegation on men by women is that the former tried to get in a physical relationship with the later without her consent.
Men should understand that following is not a consent for physical relationship :
- a girl in short dress
- a girl alone on street at midnight
- a girl alone in a room with you
- girl alone in a car at midnight
- girl in a club
- a girl going on dinner or drinks with you
But what's more common mistake is that women pretend to know the intent of a male even without any prior knowledge of his character.
So, the question quite certain here is that how can one think of consenting or not consenting for a thing which other didn't even intend to do ?
So, if we are urging men to understand what is consent and what is not, women should also recognize that following is not an intent for assault :
- a boy approaching a girl wearing a short dress
- a boy coming and sitting next to a girl in a bus or train
- a boy in an overfilled bus or train who is helpless and can't stop himself from pushing a female passenger standing in front.
- a boy approaching a girl walking alone on street at midnight.
The current mindset of Indian society is that people think women need more attention.What they need to understand and realise is - being a woman is not a disability and hence they do not demand special care.
Let me finish by quoting an incident -
A man used to go to his office daily by bus. Once a woman hopped on to already filled bus, so this man, vacated his seat for her. Next day, the same woman boarded the bus and the same man again left his seat. This went on for a few days and now the woman used to get on the bus and stand next to that same man who would offer his seat. But one day, this man decided not to leave his seat for that woman, leaving her extremely annoyed and frustrated.
This incidence had put me in a dilemma, as to whether the man was right or wrong. Can you help me out with this ?
What do you think? Do you think man was insensitive in not offering his seat ? or you think woman was wrong in getting annoyed with male co-passenger?
Speak up and don't forget to LEAVE YOUR COMMENTS in the comment section below !!
- AMAN BANSAL
FOLLOW ON TWITTER - @bansalaman23
LIKE MY PAGE ON FACEBOOK - Shayari ke Khatir
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